Six Strategies for Overcoming Post Natal Depression

Have you noticed you are feeling very tearful, hopeless, guilty and anxious lately? Are you less interested in things that you used to enjoy or have difficulty making decisions?

Postnatal depression develops within the first three months after giving birth and occurs in 1 out of 7 women in Australia.

Becoming a parent involves so many changes. It can change your relationship with your partner, family, career, your body and society as a whole, as you take on a new identity as ‘mother’ or ‘father’. It can involve changes to your financial situation and often involves many physical changes for women, such as weight gain, fatigue and stretch marks. On top of this there are the unrealistic expectations and myths projected on parents of what parenthood should be like, and when the reality doesn’t match, it can be difficult to come to terms with this.

1. Let go of Perfection

Work out what activities you have to do each day and what you’d like to do.

The reality is your child needs to be fed, cuddled and cleaned regularly. It doesn’t matter if the dishwasher isn’t emptied straight away or their toys are messy. Priortise what matters, which is your child’s health and your health, and not having a house that looks amazing at all times.

2. Do something for yourself

Have you ever been on a plane and noticed that you are told during the safety procedure that you need to put on your own oxygen mask first, before helping others? Having some time for yourself needs to be moved from seen as a luxury to a necessity. If you want to effectively support your child, you need to look after yourself.

If you can, organize time to see friends or family. If this is not possible for any reason, then ask your partner if you can have an hour off to walk around the block, go for breakfast at a café by yourself or to have a bath by yourself.

3. Ensure you are eating regularly

If you are overwhelmed by not only looking after your family, but also yourself, make things a little easier for yourself. Buy paper plates that you can throw away and buy easy food like ready-made meals, salads leaves, cooked chicken or tuna snacks. Use services like Hello Fresh or Marley Spoon who deliver fresh ingredients with easy to follow recipes to your home each week. Make sure you are eating three meals a day and at least two snacks and carry water around with you.

4. Prioritise sleep

It can be tempting once the baby is finally asleep to stay up for a few hours scrolling on Instagram or watching Netflix, so that you feel like you have some ‘me time’. However, it is important to use this time to catch up on sleep. Getting an extra hour of sleep will be much more beneficial for your overall mental and physical health than watching those Instagram stories.

 5. Be assertive:

Everyone has their own (often unwanted!) opinion on babies that they will provide you with during this time. Different opinions may also cause conflict in your relationship with your partner. It’s important to be assertive in these situations, so that you can express your frustration in a healthy way.

·      Describe the facts of the situation – I changed the babies nappy five times this morning and you did not change any nappies

·      State your thoughts and feelings using (‘I’ language not ‘you’ language)– This made me feel upset and frustrated because I felt like my time isn’t important

·      State what you want – Next time I’d like it if we shared the responsibility and alternated changing the nappies

6. Find Support

Have you heard the saying ‘It takes a village to raise a child’? Yet, we live in a culture where parents are often expected to parent alone. This isolation and stress can contribute to depression. It’s important to find to following types of support:

·      Emotional Support – Often from friends or family you can talk to who make you feel heard and re-energized when you connect with them

·      Social Support – Meeting up with a group of parents with children of a similar age

·      Practical Support – When people say ‘let me know if I can help’ ask them to assist you with practical tasks (e.g. minding the baby whilst you have a shower or run some errands at the supermarket). If you do not have friends or family around, consider hiring someone a few hours every week or fortnight to help clean the home or baby-sit your child

·      Information Support – Develop a strong team of health professionals around you, including doctors, nurses and psychologists